Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Bad Houseguests

Aunt Flo rolled in like a gangsta bitch all loud and proud about 3pm today...uninvited as always! I mean, who does she think she is just showing up in my uterus?!? I've had a sit down talk with her and she is well aware that she is not invited back here because she is a horrible house guest - like the kind that leaves shit all over your house and is really noisy at 5AM....she's just annoying! I will send her packing next week. I have given her directions to a nice unsuspecting china woman and told her to not bother with calling or writing. Hopefully she'll be leaving just before Thanksgiving.
Silliness aside, I did start my period today, but on a positive side (I'm really working on being positive) this is the most normal cycle I have had - 28 days baby!! I have gone from 57 days in June down to a normal 28 day cycle which tells me that something is working - that's something to be happy about, right? Months ago I had to take something to start my period, but I have started on my own for 4 months in a row! Something else to be happy about.
So, same shit, different cycle! I'll start 150 mg of Clomid on Saturday and should be a hormonal raging lunatic right in time for Thanksgiving - this could be a very interesting year for shopping the day after Thanksgiving - Mom, I hope you're ready! Watch out bitches here we come!!!


Melanie said...

oh shawnie. you are hilarious! i'm totally sorry that you got your stupid f-ing period, but i am happy you have a good attitude about it. see you tomorrow.

Megan said...

I think that first line is the funniest thing I've read in a while!! I am glad things are starting to regulate for you. Things seem like they are falling into place!!

Aimee said...

You are to frickin' funny! Hopefully Flo will get your message. If not, you can send her my way - i'd take her as a houseguest anyday, so you can get rid of her! :) I'm glad you're trying to stay positive ~ i'm sure it's hard! See you bright and early in the morning!

ReeRee said...

I'm so happy things are getting regulated for you. Hopefully you won't see flo for another 10 months!! I'll be prayin'!

Mommy Brain said...

That is truly the funniest thing I've read in a LONG time! Sorry you got your period...you can send her my way any time you want.

BTW, do you make Thanksgiving cookies??? My Jed has been talking about those cookies since the baptism, he literally won't stop lamenting his bad fortune that they were gone when he went back for his second. It's funny...so I was thinking that maybe I could order some for Thanksgiving...or Christmas whatever works for you. What do ya say?

Jen said...

AF is a bitch, ain't she. I'm sick of seeing her in your neck of the woods. Or hearing about her arrival I guess I should say!

Mommy24 said...

Hey Shawnie! LMAO (like that, aye?...still 36..don't confuse me with any more of those!) Flo's been hanging out at our house, too. Know that I'm thinkin' about you!

Leenie said...

I want to come shopping w/ you!
Look on the bright side of things:
1. You can drink at the christmas party in 3 weeks.
2. You don't have to have sex for a few days.
3. You can use a "HEAVY FLOW" as an excuse to sleep in on Saturday.
4. Maybe you can apply for a handicap parking permit to get good parking for shopping after Thanksgiving.
and #5...Your finally getting back to your normal cycle so it is all worth it in the end.
After Mops this morning..be thankful for your thorn:)

mommy to an angel said...

When I made this post I was thinking about the Christmas party, but didn't realize it was 3 weeks away so I thought I'd have to wait until my next cycle to see if I could drink - I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it, I'm about to lose control and I think I like it!
Woo-hoo, bring on the Martinis baby!
Maybe if I stopped drinking so much I would get pregnant! I really don't drink as much as it sounds though. It takes me 1.5 drinks to get drunk and 2 to be wasted - just ask Leenie - I wasted a $30 meal from Longhorn a couple of weeks ago and begged Brian not to take me home becuase my mom was there - yes, I know I'm 29, but she's my mommy!!
Thanks Leenie for the good news - you brightened my day!